Don't take it personally...

Does anyone else struggle with this phrase, or am I the only one?

What do I mean?

When something happens unexpectantly,

When someone makes a decision that you didn't necessarily see coming,

When you get left out of the conversation,

When your best friend visits and there were no plans for them to catch up with you!

Don't take it personally...

Yeah right!!

Of course I'm going to take it personally!

But why?

Am I some needy person who has to be included in anything and everything?

Do I need to know the latest news about all my friends?

Does what I think matter so much that when a decision is made, if I wasn't a part of it I get offended...even though it's none of my business!

So, why does the phrase "don't take it personally" tick me off?!

I have asked this question several times since last December.

Do I have answers? I would like to think I do, but in reality all I have are empty answers...and answers that I don't like.

I know why I take things personally...I want to be included,

I want to be wanted,

I want my ideas to matter to someone and something,

I want to feel like I am accepted by my family, friends, employer, co-workers...

I want to be loved, cared for, and discipled!!

IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR?!?!?!?!

Yes, I know I should find all of the above in God,

I've taught it to students,

I've studied the bible verses,

I've read the books,

And I've have several conversations about this one thing...

So why do I still struggle with taking things personally?

Am I too loyal to people?

Do I easily give my heart away?

Am I too friendly?

Is my kindness mistaken for weakness?

Right when I was at the point of giving up...I read this,

Inward peace comes with absolute surrender to the will of God. You need to come to a simple calmness of spirit which comes from giving up everything to God and having patience with your neighbor. Learn to accept counsel with humility and straightforwardness. This will help you grow closer to God. The reason you feel so agitated is that you do not accept everything that happens to you with complete trust in God. Put everything in His hand, and offer yourself to Him as a sacrifice. The moment you stop wanting things to be your way, you will be free from so much worry and concern. You won't have to hide anything or make up excuses for anything. Until you reach this point of surrender, your life will be full of trouble and aggravation. Your talents will torment you. Your religious ideals will condemn you. So give your heart wholly to God and you will find peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.

Well, I got nothing!!

I guess I will continue to let my heart be refined by the one who created things like the planets, mountains, and coffee!!

What about you?